Tuesday, 15 December 2015

I hide

Do you know that i hide feelings behind walls thicker than your pride? Do you know that i hide behind toilet doors just to not let you see me cry? Do you know that i hide my inner screams within myself, and only for myself to hear? Do you know that i hide my scars underneath a facade of strength? Do you know that i hide myself, my true being, just to please your soul?

Of course, you wouldn't know. Cause i've been hiding from you. You don't know how i really feel.

I feel tarnished. Drenched. Mistaken. Languid. Forbidden. Pushed over. Done.

The tears i hold back are in a form of passion, where the passion is hate. Hatred, from the grudges i've been holding on against you.

My inner voice screams to me every night, pointing out what a fool i've been for being selfless and forgiving. Its screams are as piercing and alarming as a siren's call, yet i'm the only one who hears.

I build a pillar of strength out of paper in hopes of protecting my scars. The blemishes on my skin just shows how tainted and imperfect my soul is. And you wouldn't want a peek of that part of me.

Cause once you realise my flaws, you'd see a broken me.

Who would like a broken piece?

That is why i hide.

I hide from you so that you'd be pleased, satisfied, and convinced. In other words, i'm a fake to you.

And by you, i mean everyone.

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